This week a federal district court in California struck town the ballot measure passed by the voters defining marriage as between a man and a woman. In effect, pending appeal, it legalized homosexual marriage.
But then there will be an appeal. And surrounding the appeal will be rallies, protests, editorials, commentaries, sermons, and more.
The battles have already started.
And in the midst of the battle, the most dangerous place is right in between the warring parties.
That’s where I find myself.
I voted for that ballot measure, and I would do so again. I believe marriage is designed by God and we cannot change it’s nature. I believe homosexual behavior is sin and harms those who engage in it. And I believe the activists who are so fervently trying to make everyone believe what they believe–especially school children–are harming others–especially those children. It teach this and I will continue to do so.
So what’s the problem?
I often find myself seriously embarrassed by the behavior of those who agree with what I said above.
Too often they seem to believe that their correct stance (from my perspective) gives them freedom to stretch the truth, overreact, demonize people–basically to NOT love those who disagree with them.
Already I am hearing rhetoric that scares me. It scares me because of what it does to those who are right. When we allow ourselves to see other people as our enemies we become the enemy. Paul says our struggle is not against flesh and blood. That means that those who *are* flesh and blood cannot be our enemies. They are people for whom Jesus died. And whatever their beliefs, whatever their behavior, our job is to love.
We are to love the judge who (in my opinion) made such a huge error.
We are to love the attorneys and lobbyists and politicians who fight for what we believe is wrong–and who often don’t particularly love us.
We are to love people around us regardless of their sexual behavior.
And yes, part of that love is telling the truth. But, as Paul says, to “truth in love”.
So, here I am on the fence in this particular battle. If you choose to take a shot at me, that’s ok. I will love (or at least try my best) you anyway.
Know Jesus, and Be Faithful.
The timing on this subject and your blog couldn't be more perfect in encouraging us to love the other, not become THEIR enemy. God is not their enemy (at least right now) and neither should we. Some choose to, but we are commanded not to be. We are to live peaceably. But like you said, we are to love them-doing what's best for them-and THAT is the challenging part.
It's interesting how this battle has made us strange bed-fellows with some whom we've historically tried to distance ourselves from. The LDS Church has a lot of money, but I find it makes my stomach turn a little to know we've been using their "temple tithes" to fund a campaign that to outsiders puts all of us in a the same stereotyped "Bigotry" Boat. I voted yes on Prop 8 too, but I've come to have some serious reservations as to whether I would again. While I too believe that real marriage is between one man and one woman, I'd like to disassociate myself from those who have historically and openly hoped for some form of American theocracy. They don't help our case.
Unfortunately, I fear that the damage has already been done and I wonder if the best thing now is to cut our losses. Or perhaps we should argue for a state that has removed itself from the politics of marriage altogether. We can give all "couples" equal rights to tax and death benefits, but if the state does not agree with our definition of marriage, do we need the state to tell us whether we're married at all?
I have to agree with your sentiments if not your conclusion. The fact is the state *is* involved in deciding what marriage is–and what children will be taught about marriage. This is my biggest concern in this whole discussion. I have watched an amazing and scary trend in schools over the last 35 years. Young children are taught immorality as good, and morality as bigotry. They are encouraged to "experiment" and parents are vilified if they object. I'm not a reactionary. I know many reports of this type of thing are exaggerated or just plain manufactured. But I have also seen it actually happen–and this is without a law that saws two men or two women can get married. I have no faith in America as a country–it is a secular state and it will pass. I just don't want to be part of the problem in the process.
I definitely know where you're coming from, Uncle Randy. I grew up in that liberalized education system and I was taught that things like the "M" word and male-male female-female relationships were perfectly normal in my sex ed class. But it wasn't the school system that had the most impact on my understanding of healthy sexual relations. It wasn't even my peers who in general had an even more perverted view of things. It was my parents establishing trust, telling me what they believed, and being there for any questions I had that taught me how to live a Godly life. We can't expect this of secular institutions. We have to expect it of Christian parents.
In the meantime, there is a small movement starting (in some ways as a reaction to this very subject) that hopes to get the government out of the marriage business completely. I'm no Libertarian, but Ron Paul actually campaigned for this in 2008. Americans resonate with more personal freedom from the government not more restrictions. If we as Christians got behind a campaign to "free" our citizens from government influence in the marriage arena instead of trying to use government to control non-believers, I think we would find much more success legally and in our witness as Christ-followers. Then, Christian churches could marry Christian men and women to each other and recognize marriages according to Biblical principals. If two gay men get "married" somewhere else, I don't have to call them husband and husband because the state doesn't call them that either. We could even campaign to remove all discussion of marriage from school curriculum. Why do we need schools to teach our kids that anyway? Let them focus on the subjects they're already having trouble getting across, like reading and math…
I totally agree about the parents' responsibility–and the church's responsibility to equip and support the parents. But if you ask any teacher in a public school they'll tell you the majority of the parents of the kids in their classes aren't interested in supporting or teaching their kids. I fear abandoning those kids to whatever the popular or politically powerful at the time want to tell them.
A very tough situation, for sure. There are a whole lot of kids who need protection from bad parents, bad teachers, and bad culture. Lord, please come quickly!